Lego My Whiskey!
By Steve Herte
Is
anyone else tired of shoveling snow, or am I the only one? I
seriously think I gave the world (or at least my neighborhood)
a “Kina Hora” when I said something about having more snow
when I was a kid after snowstorm Janus. Now we’re going to get more
snow today? That’s carrying negative Karma a bit too far (although
I am getting better at the job and completing it in less time). Plus,
manual labor does make my relax time much more satisfying.
I
noticed in the Sunday paper today that Toys
R Us is
having a huge sale on all their Lego sets. Not surprising after the
movie, and you’ll see why. And wasn’t it Dire Straits who said
in “Sultans of Swing” that, “now you step inside, but
you don’t see too many faces...?” This was almost true of the
restaurant I dined in – again, you’ll see why. Enjoy!
The
Lego Movie (WB, 2014) – Directors: Phil Lord
and Christopher Miller. Writers: Dan Hageman, Kevin Hageman (story);
Phil Lord, Christopher Miller (story & s/p). Cast: Chris Pratt,
Will Arnett, Elizabeth Banks, Will Ferrell, Morgan Freeman, Liam
Neeson, Shaquille O’Neal, Nick Offerman, Channing Tatum, Billy Dee
Williams, Jadon Sand, Anthony Daniels, Will Forte, & Jonah Hill.
Color and 3D, 100 minutes.
Growing
up I had various construction toys. I loved Lincoln Logs and my
Erector Set with which I built rustic cabins and lodges and (in the
case of the latter) a working Ferris wheel. There were also Tinker
Toys to make simpler, less life-like structures. I had to use my
imagination with them. I didn’t play with Legos until much, much
later in life and had no idea these basic bricks could be formed into
the complex structures I now see enthusiasts building.
That
said, I was totally unprepared (and slightly biased – being an
animation junkie) for what story The Lego Movie would present
and how it would get around the limited mobility of the mini-figures.
The trailers gave nothing away and, frankly, made the film look lame.
However, this is one movie that must be seen to be believed and
understood.
Emmet
Brickowoski (Pratt) is an ordinary construction worker who is thrust
into greatness when he accidentally is glued to the “Piece of
Resistance,” a simple-looking red oblong tube. He has no idea it’s
there until he meets Wyldstyle (Banks), a tough-talking, kung-fu
fighting female who calls him “The Special” and takes him on a
wild chase to the dwelling place of Vitruvius (Freeman). Vitruvius is
a blind sage in a white robe who tries to guide Emmet in the ways of
being a master-builder and savior from the villain, Lord Business
(Ferrell), who is threatening to use the ultimate weapon, “the
Kragle” (basically, a tube of Krazy Glue with the letters “z”,
“y”, and “u” unreadable). The Lord’s plan, which he will
carry out with the assistance of his henchman Bad Cop/Good Cop
(Neeson), is to glue everything in the worlds of Lego so that nothing
can move or be rebuilt from the existing pieces. The “Piece of
Resistance” turns out to be the cap to the Krazy Glue tube.
When
Vitruvius takes Emmet on a journey into his own mind they discover he
has a special relationship with “The Man Upstairs” that no other
master builder has (otherwise his mind is blank and his constructions
silly). They all go to meet with the Master Builders’ Council,
which includes many of the Lego mini figures: Batman (Arnett) who
turns out to be Wyldstyle’s boyfriend, Superman (Tatum), Green
Lantern (Forte), Abraham Lincoln (Hill), Shaquille O’Neal, various
others, and a monstrous Metalbeard the Pirate (Offerman), who is an
amalgam of spare parts, including a double-barreled shotgun for a
left hand and a shark on his right arm. No one believes in Emmet and,
after his speech most leave the gathering. Eventually they are all
captured by Lord Business and imprisoned in his “think tank,”
which uses their creativity to build whatever he wants.
Even
though there is a somewhat serious situation to be overcome, The
Lego Movie never takes itself seriously. There are funny
sight gags throughout, puns galore and some really creative, funny
lines. I salute the writers Hageman. At one point Emmet suggests that
they need a hyper drive and Batman jokes, “Where are we going to
get one of those? Is a spaceship just going to appear out of
nowhere?” And zip! The Millenium Falcon (all in Legos) appears in
the window with Han Solo, Chewbacca, C-3PO (Daniels’ voice) and
Lando Calrissian (Williams). The animation is so well done that one
forgets everything in the movie is made of Lego pieces, including the
undulating waves of the ocean and water rushing into the submarine
(blue and white Lego disks).
But
the real surprise comes after Emmet falls into a bottomless hole,
leaving him immobile on the floor of a basement. He fell off the
enormous table holding the various Lego worlds constructed by the
“Man Upstairs” and is picked up off the floor by his son Finn
(Sand), who is the one responsible for all his adventures. The camera
then pans to the basement stairs, and Ferrell descends, discovering
the wild things his son has created with the Lego city he
painstakingly built. Their subsequent dialogue makes him realize that
“following the rules” (as Emmet can only do) has to coexist with
creativity and imagination and he relents in Krazy Gluing everything.
With
a nod toward my reader in England, Stuart, this is a film for all
ages, especially children. The three sitting behind me were so
awestruck I had to remind them to stop kicking my seat. But adults
will also laugh at the clever gags and jokes, as did the couple in
front of me. I learned that just as you can’t judge a book by its
cover, you can’t always tell what a movie will be like from the
trailers.
Rating:
4 out of 5 Martini glasses.
American
Whiskey
247
West 30th Street (between 7th and
8th Avenues), New York
From
the photo on their website I was convinced this cavernous space with
20-plus foot ceilings and two chandeliers, and bison and deer heads
high on the walls would be impossible to miss from the street. I was
wrong. I Google-mapped the address and saw nothing but gated shops
and scaffolding with no indication that American Whiskey was there at
all. I was not deterred. The opening boast, “Here, it’s all about
the whiskey. Over 150 American made choices, with award-winning
cocktails and a Southern-inspired menu…” was irresistible (even
though I prefer gin). Then there was the online menu. The link to the
All Day Menu was so slow that it gave my computer heart stoppage and
never uploaded. I let them know about that. I had to go to a “menu
pages” website to view it. I was hooked.
Walking
from 8th Avenue, I saw the same gated shops and
scaffolds I saw on Google and I had almost passed by American Whiskey
when I noticed the minimal menu-stand outside and a small sandwich
board flanking a nondescript glass-doored entrance. Once inside a
tidal wave of high volume music washed over me and I knew I had to
speak up to be heard at the Captain’s Station.
The young lady, who
would eventually be my server, led me and two young men to the back,
up two flights of stairs to a darkly lit upper room overlooking “the
cavern.” She gave me a choice of two tables and sat the others at a
table so tall it required stools. The tiny spots overhead and the
single votive candle on my table were enough to see generally but
when Gabrielle brought the menu card (food on one side, drinks on the
other) I had to hold my candle to it to read it. The brightest light
was coming from three flat-screen televisions playing the Olympics
(which I was mildly interested in) and soon after the University of
New Hampshire vs. Boston University hockey game (which I wasn’t,
except I wanted to fix New Hampshire’s uniforms – their initials
are like the sound one would make when they slam into a wall).
Having
become comfortable and looking around I noticed the crowd was much
younger than I and I barely increased the median age by two years.
They were quite lively and their conversation almost on a par with
the background music, some of which songs I could identify. Gabrielle
asked if I would like to start with a cocktail and I chose one with
the dubious but intriguing title “Strike Me Dead.” It arrived in
a standard tumbler, a pleasing shade of gold over ice. The
combination of Templeton Rye, Black Pepper Maple Syrup, and Maple
Bitters was interestingly sweet and spicy at the same time. I could
taste the maple over the rye as well as savor the bite of the black
pepper.
I
asked Gabrielle if ordering one of the “Small” dishes, one of the
“Sliders” and a “Large” dish (the three main categories on
the menu) was too much food but she said no. I started with the Bison
Tartare – topped with capers, onions, pickled mustard seed, and
Basil and sided with homemade potato chips. Anything “tartare” is
an acquired taste (actually an acquired mind-set – you’re eating
essentially raw meat) but having had Steak Tartare, Tuna Tartare,
Pork Tartare (yes I did, in Germany) and Carpaccio several times I
was ready.
Bison is leaner than most steaks, something I learned in
Calgary, Alberta, and the flavor of the meat is a little stronger
than beef but without the fat. I used the chips to scoop the tartare
and it was lovely. I had finished my cocktail and thought my
traditional drink would go better with the appetizer. Upon learning
that they were out of Beefeaters Gin I chose a gin unknown to me,
Aviator’s, which, I later found out, is a product of Portland,
Oregon, and was not disappointing. In fact, it made a comparably good
martini.
My
concern about ordering too much food disappeared when the slider
arrived. I have always known sliders to be served in threes, but this
one was alone on the plate. The Duck, Duck, Goose Slider stacked Duck
confit, Duck breast, Duck “Foie Gras,” Butter, Watercress and
Pickled Apple into a fluffy, golden brown bun. I seriously wished it
had two brothers it was so good but was glad it didn’t when my main
course arrived.
What
else is more appropriate in a Southern style restaurant than
Blackened Catfish resting on a lava floe of rich Cheese Grits (they
call them Georgia Ice Cream in Atlanta) with Roasted Tomato and
Cippolini onions? The flaky, peppery fish and the sensuous grits took
me back to where the morning glories twine around the door and
everyone says “Hi y’all!” I took two bites and wondered if I
could finish a side dish as well. A few bites more and I decided I
couldn’t. After I finished every bit I needed some time to think of
dessert. So, in my best Southern drawl I asked Gabrielle, “In the
words of Kyra Sedgwick, ‘Do you have a glass of Merlot?’”
Gabrielle smiled, said yes and was off to procure it. As I might have
said before, I normally do not like Merlot, but this one was perfect
– a nice deep red color, mild nose and full flavor – just like my
first taste of Merlot.
Shortly
after perusing the four dessert choices, I told Gabrielle that I just
had to have the real Bread Pudding – a fluffy, two-inch high mound
of goodness redolent of good bourbon and topped with creamy vanilla
ice cream. Between the Merlot and the bread pudding I had no need of
coffee. I thanked Gabrielle for her charming service, paid the check,
visited the room marked “Both,” and was happily on my way home.
Thinking back on the experience, maybe I should tell Diane Sawyer
about a restaurant where nearly everything is “Made in America”.
My only curiosity was the 150 whiskeys. They weren’t listed on the
menu. Maybe I have to return to see if they have a separate “Whiskey
Menu.”
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