Snow White and the Huntsman

Dinner and a Movie

Snow White in a Barrel

By Steve Herte

Snow White and the Huntsman (2012) 

Walt Disney never gave a name to the Evil Queen in their version of Snow White, originally by the Brothers Grimm. In the TV series, we are introduced to Regina who wants to take “Happily ever after” away from everyone but herself. In Mirror, Mirror, Julia Roberts plays a washed out version of a once again, nameless Queen. Now, in Snow White and the Huntsman, we meet Ravenna, played by Charlize Theron (and coincidentally, she does turn into a flock of ravens and wears one dress completely of black feathers and another whose neckline is studded with bird skulls), who steals Snow White’s kingdom by creating a phantom army for King Magnus (Noah Huntley) to vanquish, using her whiles to seduce the King into marriage and then kill him. 

She locks the child, Snow White, in a tower of the castle and goes about literally sucking the beauty out of the fair maidens in the kingdom and taking gooey (but sensual) milk baths to remain youthful and beautiful. In the battle (this time with a real army) where she takes over the kingdom, Snow White’s brother William (did you know she had one?) escapes with his uncle, Duke Hammond (Vincent Regan), whose castle and lands are just beyond the Dark Forest – a nasty place where nothing is green. Everything is either creeping, crawling or slithering. 

Of course the Queen consults her magic mirror daily, which is what looks like a gigantic brass serving plate that melts to reform itself into a quasi-human shape to give her the answers she needs. She and her brother Finn (Sam Spruell) rule the dying kingdom where nothing grows or blooms (one has to wonder why the townsfolk stayed) until they start to run out of young maidens. 

Snow White (Kristen Stewart) is now a young woman and the mirror tells Ravenna that Snow’s innocence will be her undoing if she doesn’t get her heart first.  She sends her lustful brother to bring Snow White to her and Snow White escapes him using a loose nail as a shiv that she pried from the stones outside her window and was alerted to by a pair of magpies (no, not Heckle and Jeckle).

The Queen is outraged at her bumbling brother when he reports that Snow ran into the Dark Forest and none of their men followed her. She learns of a Huntsman (Chris Hemsworth) who has been a drunkard since his wife died and is the only one who knows the Dark Forest. Promising to bring back his wife, Ravenna convinces him to go after her.

Then the fun begins. There are more Rhinoceros Beetles in the Dark Forest than there are in creation. At a bridge spanning nothing there is a troll who looks like a monster from Star Wars. Snow and the Huntsman almost get killed by the eight dwarves – Beith (Ian McShane), Muir (Bob Hoskins), Gort (Ray Winstone), Nion (Nick Frost), Coll (Toby Jones), Duir (Eddie Marsan), Quert (Johnny Harris), (whoops, one of them, Gus played by Brian Gleeson, is killed by an arrow shot by William, played by Sam Claflin). There is an enchanted forest with fairies who look like androgynous, cute versions of Gollum and where Snow encounters a creature larger than a horse, but mostly Rocky Mountain sheep, with tree branches for antlers. This creature is also shot with an arrow and transforms into a flock of butterflies. The special effects department went wild with this film.

This is not your mothers’ or grandmothers’ version of the story. Snow White becomes more of a Joan of Arc, as did Alice in a previous film produced by the same people, donning armor and leading the army against the Queen. The Huntsman, not Prince Charming gives Snow White the kiss of true love when the Queen tricks her into eating the poison apple posing as her brother, not a grizzled old lady. 

At two hours and seven minutes, it is almost too long but it only rarely slows down. The reason I wasn’t “wowed” by it was the thick accent on the Huntsman and several of the dwarves making many of their lines incomprehensible. Otherwise, Snow White and the Huntsman was original, intriguing and entertaining.  But I still vote for Regina as the most evil Queen.

La Barrique

38 West 39^th Street (5^th/6^th), New York

Even knowing the “restaurant desert” of the West 30’s, I was lured by La Barrique’s website. The main photo is of an arched-ceilinged brick wine cellar with rows of enormous barrels (La Barrique means barrel). Upon arriving at the restaurant, however I thought I was in the wrong place, as it looked nothing like that – no barrels at all. Once a waitress confirmed that had indeed arrived at the correct address, she led me to a table in the back (next to the kitchen – otherwise known as Mongolia) from where I could view the whole restaurant. One whole wall is exposed brick and faces a wall of cream edged with walnut woodwork. The lighting is provided by hanging globes invoking the steakhouses of the Thirties and Forties.

My waiter (who, I learned later, spoke French) brought me a very nice Beefeater martini, three baguettes in a basket, the two-page menu and the laminated wine/cocktail list. After re-inserting the paper menu pages in the corner tabs of the plastic folder – they fell out as soon as I opened it – I searched vainly for something new and unusual. Learning from my waiter that the soup du jour was Cream of Asparagus (asperges, in French), I started with that. Fortunately, it wasn’t creamed but pureed and very tasty with a slightly cheesy overtone. The prices were very good on the wines, so I ordered a bottle of Argentinean Malbec (I never go wrong there).

The second course was billed on the menu as “Escargot in Crispy Puff Pastry.” Intrigued, I ordered it. What came out was two small soggy, limp, doughy eggrolls with (yes, I counted) two escargots in each flanked by some limp leaf lettuce and some indeterminate (maybe French) dressing. Needless to say, it was disappointing but the wine helped keep me keep smiling.

The main course per the menu was Lamb Shank over Saffron Risotto with Leeks. The lamb shank was delightful, tender and juicy. The risotto had a surprise in it – corn nibblets. The leeks were quartered and crunchy and scattered at the bottom of the bowl the course was served in. I had to remind myself what they were when I first encountered them. Basically, it was a delicious dish, but it didn’t need the corn. After finishing my wine, I demonstrated to my waiter how stale one of the baguettes was by clinking it on the bread dish, so he brought me an extra glass of wine.

The desserts looked all pedestrian so I asked my waiter which one was his favorite. The “Melting Chocolate Cake” was his answer, and so it was. The dark chocolate cake cup was filled with a loose darker chocolate cream and topped with a dollop of whipped cream. When you cut into the side of this confection the liquid slowly spilled out and it appeared to be “melting.” I almost laughed, but it was very good. The espresso machine was broken (another test failed) so I had a cup of very dark coffee. 

La Barrique deserves a second chance because of the wonderful servers but my first impression says that it does nothing to dispel the dearth of good restaurants in the West Thirties.

Kaaren Verne Tribute

Kaaren Verne

By Ed Garea 

Ever watch a movie and spot someone whom you saw a million times in movies but whose name just won’t come to mind? And you scratch your head hoping that something will come, but it never does? This column begins a new series that will focus on those actors that you see countless times, but just can’t remember the name. They are supporting actors (or in some cases, character actors) that play the little roles that can often make or break a film depending on which actors are cast and how they are cast. Some of them you will have seen in about 100 movies; some you will remember from only a few films, but they stuck in your mind nevertheless. Some have gone on to bigger and better roles, while other languished in the “Bs.” Others began in A-list movies, but because of changing fan and studio tastes, made their way down to starring in B-movies. These columns feature a bio along with some of their more memorable movies.

One of those familiar, but forgotten faces of the ‘40s was that of Kaaren Verne. Born Ingeborg Catherine Marie Rose Klinkerfuss in Berlin, Germany, on April 6, 1918, she began her acting career on the stage as a member of the Berlin State Theatre.

A fervent anti-Nazi, she fled Germany in 1938 and went to England, where she began her film career with the 1940 drama Ten Days in Paris. From there, it was on to Hollywood, where, with the outbreak of war, Nazi refugees were a hot item. Warner Brothers wanted to change her name to Catherine Young, but Kaaren balked and the only thing she changed was the dropping of the extra ‘a’ in her first name.  

Her first American film was MGM’s 1940 Nick Carter programmer, Sky Murder. She played a German refugee suspected of sabotage and was third billed behind Walter Pidgeon (Nick Carter) and Donald Meek. This was followed by an uncredited role in MGM’s 1941 comedy, The Wild Man of Borneo, starring Frank Morgan as a lovable con man. She moved to Warners and made Underground (1941) for director Vincent Sherman. It was a film that saw her give an excellent performance as a violinist that secretly belonged to the German underground. The film also allowed her a reunion with fellow actor and anti-Nazi, Martin Kosleck, who had starred with her on the Berlin stage.

She followed Underground with All Through the Night (1941), where she played a cabaret singer whose father was being held in a German concentration camp and was forced to help the Nazis. It was there that she met her second husband, Peter Lorre, whom she married in 1945 after her divorce from musician Arthur Young. She also had a meaty role opposite Robert Cummings in King’s Row, and a featured role as scientist William Post Jr.’s girlfriend in Sherlock Holmes and the Secret Weapon for Universal.  

But then the roles dried up. Apart from The Seventh Cross there was little of note. The rest of her career was spent in television, though she had some small, yet good, roles in films like Ship of Fools and Madame X.  Her marriage to Lorre ended in divorce in 1950, though they remained close over the years following. After Lorre’s death in 1964, Kaaren and third husband, film historian James Powers, adopted Lorre’s daughter, Catherine. She died suddenly on Dec. 23, 1967, at the age of 49 of a heart ailment. Following are two of her better efforts.

UNDERGROUND (WB, 1941): This is an unpretentious little “B” about life in Nazi Germany shortly after the war has gotten underway. The Franken family is happy, as younger son Kurt (Warners “B” stalwart Jeffrey Lynn) is on his way home from the front. So what if he’s lost most of his left arm from a war wound? So what if his nickname used to be “Lefty”? It doesn’t matter, he’s home.

What does matter, however, is that brother Eric (Philip Dorn) is working with the Underground. And not only working, he’s The Voice heard over pirate radio condemning the Fuehrer and his happy gang. This particularly irks SS Colonel Heller (veteran Naughty Nazi Martin Kosleck), who would just love to get his hands on the group.

The tension in the film comes from the fact that while Kurt has come home disabled he is still a staunch supporter of the Reich. Kaaren Verne is a violinist at a café with who both bothers are in love. She is also a member of the Underground and is arrested and tortured by the Gestapo. This movie pulls out all the stops, actually approaching the line where suspense stops and Grand Guignol begins: Vile, nasty Nazis in spiffy splendor, sadism, torture, whips, dungeons, betrayal, sabotage, the righteous rants by the old professor  . . . you can find it all here.

The casting and tight direction makes it work and director Vincent Sherman doesn’t allow it to drift over to the realm of camp. There’s even some humor: Fraulein Gessner (Mona Maris, who gives the movie’s best performance), Heller’s secretary, mentions to one of Heller’s thugs early in the film that she heard a rumor that Goebbels and Goehring each have 5 million marks in a foreign bank account. Near the end of the film, Heller later repeats the rumor to Gessner; only the amount has risen to 10 million marks each. Nice touch.

Memorable Quote: Fraulein Gessner (after listening to one of Col. Heller’s aides brag about a gruesome new torture he’s invented and then complaining that Himmler will take the credit): Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll get a promotion.

THE SEVENTH CROSS (MGM, 1944): It’s 1936 in Nazi Germany. Seven men, including Spencer Tracy, escape from a concentration camp. The commandant orders seven crosses to be built on the prison grounds. Each time a fugitive is captured he is put to death on the cross. Only one prisoner is left: Guess Who?

The film then concerns itself with Tracy’s flight to freedom in nearby Holland and those who help him on his journey, most notably the German (real-life) couple of Hume Cronyn and Jessica Tandy (in outstanding performances) who help Tracy despite their fear. They get him in touch with members of the Underground who get Tracy to Holland.

The underlying theme is all this is the restoration of Tracy’s faith in the goodness of human nature, despite the trappings we find ourselves in. All though it’s not completely overbearing, it’s in there enough to let us in the audience know we are watching “An Important Movie.” Kaaren Verne is Leni, the love of Tracy’s life, who promised to wait for him, but now that he’s out and about, wants nothing to do with him.

Pre-War Commie Comedies

By Ed Garea

There was something about Russia that always seemed to fascinate Hollywood. Perhaps it was the fact that a large number of the studio moguls came from the Motherland. Perhaps it was the fact that Soviet Russia was a closed society, and it was almost impossible to get the real story of what was happening there most of the time.

We knew it wasn’t the paradise it was trumpeted be in some sections of the press, but yet there was an inscrutable dimension to the country; a curtain we weren’t allowed to see behind. Hollywood painted the U.S.S.R. as a backwards dictatorship full of True Believers, who were such only because they never got to see over the fence. There were already rumbling at the time from The House Un-American Activities Committee, which was always looking for Commies under the carpet. (And what better place to look than Hollywood?)

Of the two films featured in this review, the first is a recognized classic of cinema while the second was an attempt to cash in on the success of the first. This view of the Soviet Union, however, would not last long, as our entry into World War II made the Russians our allies, and thus the depiction of the Soviet Union in Hollywood became a lot rosier, with Russia practically turned into a worker’s paradise, complete with happy, singing peasants and a proto-democratic way of life. Of course, once World War II ended and the Cold War began, the U.S.S.R. now became the one threat to our cherished way of life, and spawned in Hollywood a new line of unintentional comedies, otherwise known as The Red Scare Film. We’ll examine both genres in later columns.

NINOTCHKA (MGM, 1939): There is a common phrase familiar to fans of 30s and 40s movies called “The Lubitsch Touch” named for the director Ernst Lubitsch, whose films exhibited a sophistication and wit that enabled them to rise above their skewed panorama of the human condition. And nowhere is “The Lubitsch Touch” more on display than in Ninotchka.

The premise is simple: Three Russians entrusted to go to Paris to reclaim jewels are living it up at the best hotel while delaying the sale. Ninotchka (Greta Garbo) is dispatched to discover what’s really going on. She meets with Count Leon (Melvyn Douglas), the faithful retainer of the former Grand Duchess Swana, to whom the jewels ostensibly belong. Ninotchka wants the jewels; they belong to the people and as she tussles back and forth with Count Leon he falls in love with her – but can’t get to first base.

She is a no-nonsense dedicated Party member seemingly without any sense of humor, so Leon dedicates himself to trying to melt the wall of ice that surrounds her. (Garbo fit the role well – Lubitsch described her as “the most inhibited person he had ever worked with.”) It’s a tricky game to play and this is where Lubitsch is at his absolute best, as the give and take eventually leads us to an unexpected breakthrough. This happens at a restaurant where the Count is trying vainly to get Ninotchka to laugh with a few jokes. Totally frustrated and realizing defeat, he leans back and falls over in his chair to the delight of the crowd. As he looks up he sees Ninotchka laughing hysterically.

It’s the breakthrough moment, but though she comes to realize she’s in love with the Count, she still considers him the property of the Grand Duchess and reluctantly agrees to return to the Soviet Union and forget him. But soon after arriving back, her commissar (Bela Lugosi) dispatches her to Istanbul, where the three envoys from Paris are now messing up again. When she arrives she is surprised to see that it was a ruse to get her there as they brought along Count Leon, who straightens out everything between them and convinces her not to return to Russia.  A++

Memorable Quote - Ninotchka: The last mass trials were a great success. There are going to be fewer but better Russians.

COMRADE X (MGM, 1940): With the success of Ninotchka, MGM tried to make lightning strike twice with this rather pallid copy. Clark Gable stars as a reporter stationed in Moscow who sends coded reports to his newspaper under the pseudonym “Comrade X.” His trick in coding the messages is discovered by hotel valet Vanya (Felix Bressart) whose price for his silence is Gable taking his daughter out of the country before she is shot for being overly zealous.

Vanya’s daughter, Theodore, is a streetcar conductor with the icy personality of Garbo’s Ninotchka. However, as played by Hedy Lamarr, whom MGM was grooming to take over as the studio’s next Garbo, she comes off as stiff and uninteresting, though in terms of sexuality she far surpasses Garbo. In the end Lamarr proved to be no Garbo though this film did little, if anything, to help her reach that plateau. It lacks the sophistication – the give and take – that made Ninotchka so memorable. Gable was simply playing Gable, though he proved more amenable to comedy than did Lamarr.

Blame director King Vidor for that, for it seems that Lamarr was unprepared as how to approach her role, and Vidor wasn’t exactly known for his comedies. The best thing in the picture is the tank chase at the end, as Gable and Lamarr escape to Romania. Granted, it’s a smart take on tried and true slapstick methods. However, it isn’t enough to overcome the dull stretches in the middle where we’re waiting for something – anything – to happen.   C+

Memorable Quote - Vanya (Felix Bressart): The Communists have ideas. But they found out you can't run a government with everybody going around having ideas. So what is happening, the Communists are being executed so that Communism should succeed.

TCM TiVo Alert for June 8-14

TCM TiVo ALERT

For 

June 8–June 14

DAVID’S BEST BETS:

THE TAKING OF PELHAM 123 (June 11, 5:00 am): To be nostalgic for a moment, this movie was often on Channel 5 (WNYW) in New York City when I was growing up. My father (who is such a movie fan) and I would often watch this excellent film together when it aired. It's a smart thriller about four men who hijack a NYC subway car for ransom money. Walter Matthau was a wonderful actor, and this is among his best as a cynical transit authority police lieutenant who deals directly with the criminals. While it's a great drama, there are a lot of comedic moments and the final scene is one of the most memorable in movie history. This film came out in 1974, and is right up there with the excellent NYC-based gritty crime dramas of the era, including The French Connection (1971), Serpico (1973) and The Seven-Ups (1973).

THE KILLER IS LOOSE (June 9, 9:15 am): This 1956 film noir has Joseph Cotten (one of my favorite actors) as a police lieutenant who is the target of an escaped convict (played by Wendell Corey). Three years before his escape, Leon "Foggy" Poole, Corey's character, a bank teller, botches an inside-job robbery. His wife is killed when police figure out the crime and raid his house. Foggy plots revenge against Cotten, who led the raid. The movie is only 73 minutes in length, and is very fast-paced with a lot of tension as Foggy's revenge is to kill Cotten's wife - a typical mid-1950s housewife. Sort of like an eye for an eye except with spouses. While Cotten is outstanding, it's Corey who steals the movie as a guy who's been meek and ridiculed his entire life. He is a model prisoner, but all the while, he's been thinking about avenging his wife's death. 

ED’S BEST BETS:

THE TRAIN (June 9, 5:30 pm): The plot is simple – a German colonel has stolen the art masterpieces of France and is shipping them to Nazi Germany. It is up to the French Resistance to stop him. What follows is a masterpiece of war cinema. Burt Lancaster heads the Resistance cell whose mission it is to stop the train. Burt is skeptical at first, wondering if it’s worth the cost in human life to stop a trainload of mere paintings. But as the film progresses, stopping that train becomes an obsession, especially as he finds himself in a human game of chess, pitted against the German colonel in the person of Paul Schofield. Lancaster ‘s obsession to stop the train is equaled by that of Schofield, who will try to get the train through to Germany come Hell or high water.  The supporting cast is wonderful, containing many regulars from French cinema as Michael Simon as train engineer Papa Boule (who nearly steals the film), Albert Remy (The 400 Blows) as Lancaster’s right-hand man, Wolfgang Preiss (who reminds me of a German Lloyd Nolan), and the great Jeanne Moreau, who has a small, but important, part as an innkeeper who saves Lancaster from arrest and later gives him shelter. It’s a picture you won’t soon forget, with many memorable scenes and lines.

FINGERS AT THE WINDOW (June 13, 6:30 pm): Lew Ayres and Laraine Day took a break from the Dr. Kildare series to star in this enjoyable comedy/thriller. An axe murderer is stalking the streets of Chicago and the police don’t have any leads. Ayres is an out of work actor who happens to see Day running from a man carrying an axe. He saves her and captures the would-be killer, but realizes there will be further attempts on her life. He tries to figure out why she’s been targeted, but she hasn’t a clue, either. Turns out that Basil Rathbone is the villain behind it all, and that’s all I’m going to say. Charles Lederer directed the film, and his light touch adds a little relief to the suspense and allows the audience to breathe. If  you love suspenseful crime thrillers, you can’t miss with this one.


WE DISAGREE ON ... THE SHANGHAI GESTURE (June 11, 10:30 a.m.)

DAVID: B+. I've watched this film based on Ed's past recommendations. Ed is a lover of bad movies and calls this one a "laff riot." Starring Victor Mature, who both Ed and I agree was an awful actor, and an outrageous plot about a casino with Gene Tierney (who was also "actor challenged") as the young innocent looking for a good time, I figured this would be awful. I was pleasantly surprised that the movie is quite good, and not a film that is so bad, it's good. Sure, there are some ridiculous moments and this isn't Casablanca, but Mature and Tierney are good and Ona Munson is absolutely delicious as the scheming Mother Gin Sling, who runs the casino. Director Josef von Sternberg does a great job of framing the actors, particularly capturing Tierney's beauty, in a film that oozes sex.

ED: D. Von Sternberg always had a penchant for the overblown, and if the Shanghai Gesture means giving the middle finger to the audience, then this film is right on target. Poppy (Gene Tierney) is out for a night's fun in Shanghai when she stumbles into the Art Deco emporium of Mother Gin Sling (originally “Mother Godamm” in the play). Mother, played so over the top by Ona Munson (yet another Chinese with blue eyes) is in a role Anna May Wong would have done in the ‘30s (and a whole lot better at that). The highlight (?) is when Mother makes her entrance. Von Sternberg clearly wants it to be show stopping, but it’s more reminiscent of when the curtain went up on King Kong in New York. Mother sports a dress that looks as if Bob Mackie made it on a three-day drunk, a hairdo that would make Cher jealous, and hats that look like something out of a broken-down carnival. Poppy, meanwhile, has fallen under the spell of one Doctor Omar (Victor Mature). If you want a real belly laugh, check out Mature in this role as he leads Poppy into an ever-spiraling addiction to gambling and drugs. Mature tries to look devious and smarmy in the role, but all he does is give the impression that he's constipated. When Sir Guy (Walter Huston) makes his appearance and the crap hits the Fan-Tan, it's precious for all bad movie fans, especially when his relationship to Mother and that of Mother to Poppy is revealed. Not to give anything away, but let’s just say Mother's not the mothering type, if you know what I mean. Don’t miss it.

Harry's Law

On TV

See Ya, Harry!

By Jon Gallagher

I’d love to sit in on one of those discussions that TV execs have when discussing which shows to keep and which ones to dump. It’d be fascinating to see if there actually are people in the world as stupid as these morons lead us to believe they are.

Let’s take NBC for example. In 2011 they put together a mid-season replacement that attracted a lot of attention. Harry’s Law starred Academy Award-winner Kathy Bates as a 50-something patent lawyer who grew tired of the drudgery of corporate law and walked out of her world into one that she wasn’t aware existed.

She finds herself in one of Cincinnati’s rougher neighborhoods when someone falls out of the sky and lands on her.

You read that right. The guy was trying to commit suicide and had jumped off the roof of a building only to land on an awning which broke his fall, then propelled him onto Harriet “Harry” Korn. Both take it as a sign from God that she should open a law office right there.

As she’s scouting the neighborhood for a good location again, a driver careens out of control and rams into her which of course cements her decision to leave the world of corporate law behind for the satisfaction of practicing law out of a storefront. She opens up her law office in a former shoe store which still has an inventory of shoes on hand. Fortunately for Harry, her assistant who makes the move with her from corporate to storefront law just happens to be a fashion expert which leads to the opening of “Harry’s Law and Fine Shoes.”

The characters in Season One are wonderful on many levels. Paul McCrane, best remembered for his role as Dr. Robert Romono on ER, is assistant district attorney Josh Peyton who ends up going a little bonkers after being beaten by Harry in court once too often (he strips to his underwear during court while complaining about how the system strips him of his prosecutorial powers).

Damien Winslow III, played by Johnny Ray Gill, offers protection for the neighborhood with his special brand of insurance. Nate Corddry is the hyperactive driver of the car that hits Harry, who just happens to be a lawyer himself. 

It’s an interesting series, created by David E. Kelley (Boston Legal, Ally McBeal, L.A. Law, and Doogie Howser M.D.) that, like a great cook, combines just the right amounts of what’s needed – in this case drama, comedy, interesting characters, and conflict – to produce a winning recipe.

When Harry’s Law was picked up for a second season, I was anxious to see where they were going with it and what could be done with a full season’s run.

Evidently, no one ever told them, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” because that’s exactly what happened.

Harry moved upstairs, leaving the shoe store far beneath her. Instead of having a small law office, she now had a major law firm with several lawyers working for her. Instead of representing the motley crew of characters from the ghetto setting, she was now taking on clients who could afford the exorbitant rates that she must now be charging.

Gone are most of the characters who added so much to Season One, replaced by, well, lawyerly types. Adam (Nate Corddry), who tried to run her over, is still with her, but it’s obvious that they’ve quadrupled his hourly dose of Ritalin. He’s had a complete personality transplant and seems to have found an inferiority complex that would fill psychological journals.

Tommy Jefferson (Christopher McDonald) is another holdover from the first season. He’s a flamboyant ambulance chaser who opposed Harry in the first season, yet has somehow moved into one of her vacant offices in the second. His role has increased, but I’m not sure that’s a good thing.

The assistant DA from Season One, Josh Peyton, is also gone, but in his place is a lazy Susan of prosecutors, each of whom brings their own quirkiness to the courtroom. From the born-again Christian with a closet porn problem to the DA herself with a personal vendetta against Harry, the DA’s office appears to be the last refuge for lawyers who are on the fast track to a padded room. The trouble with this is that they’re TOO quirky, with writers trying to round out their characters quickly rather than letting them develop with just a problem or two.

Harry walked out of the high-priced corporate law setting into the storefront-law setting, then right back to criminal law without the store front. The journey that was so interesting became boring when she went from being a high-priced patent attorney to being a high-priced criminal attorney. She just changed her concentration, not her surroundings. That’s pretty boring. 

So why make the wholesale changes in an already successful show?

Producers of the series claim that Harry’s Law in its second season was NBC’s most watched scripted show, but that it didn’t do well with the 18-49 age demographic. According to NBC’s logic on this, those of us over the age of 50 have already purchased everything we need to purchase in our lives, so they have to aim their advertising at the 18-49 year old group who still have disposable income. The changes were made in order to appeal to the age group targeted by advertisers.

Unfortunately, it didn’t work so those of us over the magical age of 50 will just have to find another show to get attached to. It also didn’t work for those between the ages of 18 and 49 as NBC canceled the show.

Men in Black 3 (3D)

Dinner and a Movie

Men in Black 3 – Pao!

By Steve Herte

Men in Black 3 (2012) in 3D 

This third installation of the popular sci-fi comedy featuring Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones as Agents J and K focuses on an alien being named Boris “the Animal” (Jemaine Clement) who wants to lead an alien invasion of Earth. But in order to accomplish this he needs to travel back to October of 1969 and kill Agent K so that his arm is not shot off and he doesn’t wind up spending 40 years in a maximum security prison on the moon.

At first he succeeds and Agent J is extremely confused when he returns to central command and nobody knows who Agent K was, but he figures it out.  He convinces the same young man (Michael Chernus as Jeffrey Price) who enabled Boris to travel back in time to give him the capability to travel to an earlier time that same year to prevent Boris from killing K. 

One of the two best scenes in the movie is where J realizes he has to leap off one of the gargoyles on the Chrysler Building to attain the speed needed to make the “leap” in time. A brief trip through time later (including the prehistoric age – don’t ask me why – where he has a close call with a meat-eating dinosaur) he is back on the gargoyle in 1969. He meets Agent K as a young man (Josh Brolin), even though he was warned to stay away from him, and together they re-set events.

The usual polyglot of alien creatures is profoundly evident in this film, including a shark-sized monster carp, a Chinese restaurant owner with several pairs of arms under his sarong, and a bowling lane manager whose head is used as the ball (not with his consent, however). The cinematography is beautifully clear despite the time travel, but the movie as a whole lacks the sparkle of the two previous films. Even the one nostalgic scene that should have brought a tear to the audience’s eyes was lackluster.  

Jones looks and sounds tired of the series and his make-up job must have been put on with a trowel – he could barely open one of his eyes at one point. Smith’s brief explanations after flashing the “neuralizer” at a crowd were cleverly worded but not delivered with the same conviction we are used to. Josh Brolin is brilliant. His portrayal of Jones is nothing short of amazing; in fact he eclipses the other two stars. Emma Thompson as Agent O (and Agent K’s love interest) delivers a believable performance. However, my personal favorite was Griffin (Michael Stuhlbarg), an inter-dimensional creature who could see all the possible futures at once. Though he came off as slightly effeminate, he was definitely loveable and added the glimmer of genius to the movie.

If you’re a fan of the series, you’ll love it. I just cannot see where it goes from here . . . if anywhere. 

Pao!

322 Spring Street (at Greenwich Street), New York 

If this tiny corner Portuguese restaurant didn’t have a sidewalk café, it would just be large enough for a cozy bar. The open brickwork walls inside and sliding glass walls outside open to the street and combine with the Portuguese folk music to create a homey, informal atmosphere for just relaxing. The staff is attentive and my waitress was eager to help with any questions I had. Since Obrigado (thank you) is the only Portuguese word I know, we kept it to English. 

The menu is unusual in that the main dishes are on the left side of the two pages and the Appetizers and sides are on the right. So, after a Stolichnaya martini (very good) I started with the Linguiça Asada Com Aquardente (the ‘c’ is pronounced like an ‘s’): a delightful sausage about the thickness of a Kielbasa but less salty and more flavorful, which was “grilled” at my table on a little ceramic grill shaped like a pig, in flaming Portuguese Grappa. When asked how it was, I answered that it was much better than the movie I just saw. It was heavenly.

I had ordered Assobio, a Portuguese red wine from Northern Portugal, by my waitress’ advice and quickly moved it to the other side of the table when the appetizer was flamed. This rich, full-bodied wine accented both my appetizer and the main dish.

The main course was Coelho Com Avelãs (roast rabbit with hazelnuts) served on a mound of mashed potatoes with savory au jus/red wine gravy. It was tender and juicy and easy to cut off the bone, but here everything is casual; using the fingers is acceptable. It turned out to be a meat and potatoes meal because I chose the homemade potato chips as a side dish. They were not as crisp as the ones at Ivy’s Bistro (nor were they as seasoned), but I liked them anyway. 

When my waitress announced they served the best Chocolate Cake in the World, I was hooked. 

What came out was a cylinder of dark chocolate about the size of a modern Ring-Ding which when opened revealed layers of crisp, flaky dough and more rich chocolate mousse. I had to wonder, “Where is the cake?” but I didn’t care. It was excellent. After a double espresso and a glass of fine Portuguese brandy I didn’t care if I got rained upon when I left for the subway. I said my Obrigados and promised to return to Pao!

English Football Films

Green Street Visited and Revisited      

By Ed Garea

GREEN STREET HOOLIGANS (Odd Lot Entertainment, 2005): A quirky, compelling movie starring Elijah Wood, of all people. Wood plays a Harvard student unjustly expelled when a stash of cocaine is found in his dorm room. The coke, of course, belongs to his roommate, who is politically connected and can’t afford to take the hit, so Wood takes it for him in return for $10,000. Not much of a start, but once Wood goes to England to see his sister, the film begins to pick up steam. As she and her English husband both work, Wood is palmed off on the hubby’s younger brother to show him a good time.

Charlie Hunnam, in a really good turn, is the football-addicted brother. He takes Wood to a West Ham United match where Wood meets Charlie’s friends, all football hooligans. The movie really takes off as Wood and the hooligans, initially mistrustful of each other, begin to bond with Wood becoming one of them. Turns out that Charlie’s gang is the GSE – Green Street Elite, so named because West Ham’s stadium is on Green Street. The movie is an interesting study of the psychology and motivation of the football hooligans and also provides a nice turn with the maturation of Wood, who, we learn, was never exposed to this sort of society before meeting the GSE.

The GSE itself lives for two reasons: to root on West Ham, and to fight with supporters of the opposition club, Millwall, which is just across the Thames. The big plot surprise the film builds toward is not really a surprise if you’ve been paying attention, but the little things and actions in the movie are enough to make one forget all that. Also in the film as one of the GSE, Dave Miller, is Ross McCall, “Leibgott” from Band of Brothers. I’ve often wondered what happened to him because his performance in the miniseries reminded me strongly of John Garfield. The film, however, is a winner no matter how one looks at it.  A-

GREEN STREET HOOLIGANS 2 (Odd Lot Entertainment, 2009): This one, I think, went straight to video. That would not surprise me, as this was a real stinker. It picks up where the original left off after the violent showdown between GSE and the Millwall fans.

Dave Miller (Ross McCall) and two of his buddies are sent off to jail where they meet other jailed members of rival football firms who want to do them bloody harm. The damn thing looks like it was originally intended to be an American prison film, but was bought and adapted by a British firm. So what we end up with a sort of a bizarre cross between the soap Eastenders and HBO’s prison drama Oz.

Holes in the plot are quickly filled by unrelenting violence as Dave and the boys meet one disgruntled hooligan after another. Added to this mix are the tried and true roles of the Uncomprehending-but-Human Warden, the Honest Guard, and the Corrupt Guard. The Corrupt Guard develops a hatred for Dave and the boys, being as they have struck up a friendship with the Honest Guard, so she conspires with the Millwall thugs to stage a football match with the prize being release from jail. Of course she rigs it so Dave and the gang have almost no chance of winning, but the Honest Guard comes to the rescue and gets the match back on a level playing field so Dave and his boys win fair and square, and in the inevitable retribution of justice at the end, Corrupt Guard gets hers. Oh yeah, she’s a woman in a men’s prison. Oh, and in the role as the Corrupt Guard is none other than Marina Sirtis, late of Star Trek: The Next Generation.

Now here is a warning to those of you that loved the show and correctly believed that Sirtis, as Counselor Troi, was Drop Dead Gorgeous: Do not watch this film. She has hit the wall and hit it hard. I could hardly believe at first that it was she. A friend of mine who works in Hollywood told me that Sirtis is a heavy smoker, so that accounts for a lot of the disparity. She also can’t utter a sentence in the movie without using the F--- or C--- word. Usually in films such as these, the woman has a sex scene with one of the men. THANK GOD that didn’t happen! I’d have tossed my cookies.  F