Dinner and a Movie
The
Best of Times, the Worst of Times
By
Steve Herte
I've
discovered that I rush my life more during Christmastime. A couple of
time I've thought that appointments are more imminent than they
actually are. I know there are many people in my situation. That, and
with the end of the year in sight, I have my own little traditions to
accomplish. The first is that the last restaurant in the old year is
always my favorite restaurant in Manhattan: City Hall. The second is
that the first restaurant of the New Year is always my favorite one
in Brooklyn: Henry's End. Is that rushing my life or just
anticipation? Anyhow, I was confronted with a party, with food
included, on the same day I was going to the movies. This preempted a
penultimate restaurant review. Instead, I've listed my top ten and
bottom five for the new places I've visited this past year. Enjoy!
Night
at the Museum 3 –
Secret of the Tomb
(20th Century Fox, 2014) –
Director: Shawn Levy. Writers: David Guion, Michael
Handelman (s/p); Mark Friedman, David Guion & Michael Handelman
(story); Thomas Lennon, Robert Ben Garant (characters). Cast: Ben
Stiller, Robin Williams, Owen Wilson, Steve Coogan, Ricky Gervais,
Dan Stevens, Rebel Wilson, Skyler Gisondo, Rami Malek, Patrick
Gallagher, Mizuo Peck, Ben Kingsley, Crystal the Monkey, Percy
Hynes White, Dick Van Dyke, Mickey Rooney, Anjali Jay, & Bill
Cobbs. Color, 97 minutes.
There
is a qualification for my ratings, which I describe simply as the
“Wow” factor. It’s when you leave a movie feeling almost tired
from the adrenalin coursing through your system and breathe deeply
outside the theater, and either say or think the word. That’s the
only thing this film was lacking in, and only minimally at that. I
guess I can say that after the original and the first sequel I was
inured to the spectacular computer graphic effects and had come to
love and accept the cast as good friends. When I left the theater
this time I was almost sad because I realized that there was no
chance of another Museum movie in the series.
Believe me, it was obvious when, at the end of the credits there were
“loving memory” dedications to both Robin Williams and Mickey
Rooney.
It
begins in 1938 at an archeological dig in Egypt when young Cecil
(White) accidentally crashes through the ceiling of the very tomb his
father was seeking just as a violent sandstorm is nearly upon their
caravan. Although warned by the locals not to touch anything because
“the end will come,” Dad orders that the trucks be loaded quickly
and the sarcophagi and treasures are removed before the storm’s
fury hits. The key piece of this discovery is the gold tablet with
the three by three matrix of rotatable cartouches. This enables
everything in a museum to come to life after sundown.
Well,
something bad is happening to the tablet, something like a creeping
green mold that diminishes its power. Larry Daley, (Stiller) the
night watchman at the American Museum of Natural History in New York,
has by now become so familiar with the various characters in the
exhibits that he orchestrates “special effects” entertainment at
formal galas in the new glass-enclosed Rose Center, where the Hayden
Planetarium is now housed in a globe representing the sun. Everything
is going beautifully on cue: Teddy Roosevelt (Williams) trots in on
his horse and gives an elegant monologue introducing the
Constellations. Led by Leo, the Lion, they sparkle as they sweep into
the hall and dance around the ceiling. Dexter, the capuchin monkey,
descends from the center of the ceiling on ribbons and performs a
Cirque du Soleil- like acrobatic routine... until the mold creeps
farther up the tablet and everything goes crazy. Animals and
Neanderthals charge into the room, Orion starts shooting arrows at
any target he can find, and Dexter attacks Larry. The guests are
terrified and Dr. McPhee (Gervais) is mortified.
The
next night, Larry holds a confab with all the animated characters
and, with Ahkmenrah (Malek), concludes that the deterioration of the
tablet is the cause. Ahkmenrah suggests that his father would be the
one to fix it. With a bit of research, Larry learns that the only
living member of the original archeological team was Cecil (now Van
Dyke) and he visits him in the nursing home where he lives, along
with Gus (Rooney) and Reginald (Cobbs). Those who saw the first movie
remember this trio as the former night watchman and his cronies.
Cecil reveals that the sarcophagi of Ahkmenrah’s parents were sent
to the British Museum in London. Now Larry has to find a way to get
there. He begs Dr. McPhee (who is about to be fired for the debacle
at the dinner party) to take Ahkmenrah on a loan to the British
Museum. He’s forced to reveal that all the “special effects”
that night were actually happening and that the tablet was the
source. Begrudgingly, McPhee sets up the loan and Larry travels to
London with his son Nick (Gisondo), hoping this will also improve his
relationship with him. (Nick doesn’t want to go to college, but
rather wants to “spread his wings.”)
It’s
now sundown at the British Museum. Larry drives his truck to the
loading area, where he convinces the night watchwoman, Tilly
(Wilson), that he’s only dropping off a traveling exhibit from New
York. Delivery made, he parks the truck out of sight, sneaks back to
the door, and upon his knock Ahkmenrah opens it from the inside.
Tilly, meanwhile, has fallen asleep at her post. The crate is open
and to Larry’s surprise, out pops Teddy Roosevelt, Sacajawea
(Peck), Attila the Hun (Gallagher), Octavius, the Roman soldier
(Coogan), Jedediah the cowboy (Wilson), Dexter, and Laaa, the
Neanderthal (also Stiller). Upon seeing Laaa, Larry’s face falls.
They met at he confab (Laaa is a recent addition to the Neanderthal
exhibit) and Laaa, noticing their facial similarities, calls Larry
DahDah. But now he’s here in London and to keep him from getting
into trouble, Larry assigns Laaa the guardianship of the door (which
takes a good bit of time to explain to him).
The
rest go searching for the Egyptian wing while dodging all the new
animations in the museum, including a Triceratops skeleton (to become
known as “Trixie”) that doesn’t like to play “fetch” as
does Rexy the T-Rex in New York. In the chase, Octavius and Jedediah
fall into a ventilation duct, and Larry has to shut off the power to
save them from destruction. Then he straps his son’s iPod to
Dexter’s back (for the GPS tracker) and sends the monkey to locate
them. Just as Dexter is about to find them, his presence scares the
cowboy and Roman into leaping onto a model of the town of Pompeii
complete with erupting volcano.
Meanwhile,
Larry and company are tracking Octavius and Jedediah, and meet Sir
Lancelot of Camelot (Stevens). He joins them in their “quest,”
thinking they’re after the Holy Grail. After getting past a gold
statue of Garuda guarding a many-headed Chinese snake and defeating
it, all are eventually reunited in the Egyptian wing where they are
greeted by Shepseheret (Jay) and MerenKahre (Kingsley). They learn
the tablet is powered by exposure to the moon when Lancelot swipes it
thinking it to be the actual Holy Grail and gallops off on a horse to
Camelot (the musical, not the mythical place).
What
else could go wrong? Tilly wakes up, sees Laaa eating packing peanuts
at the door on her closed circuit TV, and tries to arrest them all.
Nick and Teddy lock her in her kiosk with Laaa as a guard while the
rest chase Lancelot. One of the great moments is when Lancelot passes
Trafalgar Square and the four huge lions surrounding it come alive.
“They want to play!” says Jedediah. Larry takes out his
flashlight and, like kittens, the four huge beasts start chasing the
light spot.
Night
at the Museum – Secret of the Tomb is every bit as
entertaining and funny as its two predecessors. The cast does an
excellent job (most remarkably, Dexter – his training plus, I
imagine, a bit of CGI, made his performance amazing). It’s a movie
where much going on in the background, the viewer don’t know where
to look for fear of missing something. The whole family will enjoy
it. There is physical comedy as well as clever lines. Yes, I was sad
to see this cast go but, as Robin Williams said in one of his last
lines, “Let us go. It’s time for your next adventure.”
Rating:
4½ out of 5 Martini glasses.
The
Top Ten New Restaurants (and Five Bottom) of 2014
This
is a special edition of my usual Dinner and a Movie column
because I didn’t go to a restaurant the evening of the movie.
Instead I was convinced to attend “the best holiday party of the
year.” Apparently, this particular party has gained a reputation
and, since they had the included attraction of featuring karaoke, I
signed up. Timewise, it was better to have my “dinner” at the
party first and then go to the movie. I figured out a schedule that
wouldn’t get me home too late and was surprised by the incredible
variety and amount of food and drink being served. And…it was all
pretty good, for a buffet. The KJ (Karaoke Jockey) played dance music
right up to the “witching hour” of my schedule when I was forced
to do a Cinderella (without leaving a shoe) or miss the movie. Ergo,
I didn’t get to sing. Oh well, it’s their loss.
I’ve
entitled this article emphasizing “new” restaurants with the
understanding that my two all-time favorite restaurants, City
Hall in downtown Manhattan and Henry’s End in
Brooklyn Heights were not surpassed. The top ten came close, very
close. You’ll see that the list contains one Cantonese, two
Spanish, two Mexican, a Steakhouse, an Italian, a Latino, an American
and a Ukranian. Each one in their own way had me purring with delight
and if you’ve kept up with my reviews you know the particulars.
Therefore, now I present this year’s winners of “Most Likely To
Be Revisited”:
Hakkasan
311
West 43rd St.
(bet. 8th and
9th Aves.), New
York
Hakkasan is
a tour de force of décor, caring and prompt service, innovative
cuisine and intriguing cocktails. Even the menu is transporting. I
went to this restaurant with preconceived notions about Cantonese
food and came away with a new respect for regional cuisine and the
chef. He took a style of cooking and made it into a true cuisine.
Though a little bit pricy I enjoyed every course and every drink.
They truly deserve their Michelin star.
Giorgio’s
of Gramercy
27
East 21st Street
(bet. Bdwy. and 5th Ave.), New
York
Giorgio’s is
one of those restaurants that are an established part of the New York
City scene. No one I met has anything but praise to say about it. The
confidence of the staff in the quality of their dishes was addictive
as was the actual consistently spectacular food. Though there are
crystal chandeliers and enormous floral arrangements, Giorgio’s is
not snooty or pretentious. It’s home. That and the amazing roasted
oysters would get me to return at the mere mention of the name.
El
Vez New York
259
Vesey Street, New York
I
was overjoyed when I saw this import from Philadelphia arrive in
Battery Park City. How good is it? I have not had a trip to Philly
without dining at El Vez for either dinner or lunch.
Helene cued me into this fascinating Mexican and I’m slowly trying
everything on their menu. Now that they’re at walking distance, the
goal of completing my tastings is in reach. The virtually identical
menu allows me to do just that. It’s not your Mama’s home cooking
but new twists on Mama’s recipes, ones she’d have been proud to
create. New Yorkers who have mistaken this place for Chevy’s (which
occupied the address previously) have found out that it is superior
in every way.
Tablao
361
Greenwich St. (near Franklin St.), New York
Tablao takes
Tapas and makes it not only and art form but a substantial meal. With
excellent food and wide selection of Spanish wines it is difficult
not to get caught up in the joy of Spanish culture, especially if you
arrive on Flamenco night (Friday). I’ve quoted their website before
and I quote again now, “the perfect relaxed environment for hours
of lounging, dining, drinking or just hanging out with friends...”
I've already recommended Tablao to several friends.
Taberna
del Alabardero
1776
I Street NW, Washington, D.C.
This
is the only non-New York restaurant to make this elite list. Even
though I was late for my reservation (frankly, was a little lost and
walked the wrong way first) I was treated like a member of Spain’s
royal party. With 25 years in operation, this Taberna has
developed a class act and sensitivity to their customers. Every dish
was superb and made to my specifications (my waiter’s suggestions
helped greatly in making these). The very next time I’m in D.C. I
promise to revisit.
Distilled
New York
211
West Broadway (at Franklin St.), New York
Distilled claims
to be redesigning the public house and, to a certain extent they are
achieving that. People there are not only enjoying the food but also
the company of other diners as well. I generally refuse if given the
choice between a seat at the bar or a table, but not here. Here, it’s
called the Chef’s Table and it’s not only comfortable but it’s
fun. Where else can you get Mead and Moonshine, Paté
and Fried Duck and Waffles? As they sing in the song
“42 Street,” Distilled is where “the
underworld can meet the elite.” And they both have a good time.
Rayuela
165
Allen Street (bet. Stanton and Rivington Sts.), New York
The
tree growing in the center of this restaurant is not the only thing
that makes it unique; nor the banquettes that are wider than your
legs are long. They are both a part of the free style of this
wonderful Latino eatery named after a version of hopscotch. In
business for seven years before I discovered it, Rayuela has
been serving excellent, well prepared and extremely flavorful food to
many satisfied customers. I know, I was one of them. And anyone who
has set ideas about flan should try Rayuela’s.
Korchma
Taras Bulba
357
West Broadway (bet. Grand and Broome Sts,), New York
When
the Old World is recreated so well that it brings a tear to the eye
you know you’ve arrived at this charming (and extremely rare)
Ukrainian restaurant. The food is simple and hearty and the portions
are just right. If you’re not in the right frame of mind, there’s
plenty of vodka in several flavors (and a shot before you leave). The
staff dresses in peasant costumes and will let the patrons wear their
straw hats if asked. Who knew there was more than one recipe for
Borscht?
Añejo
Tribeca
301
Church St., New York
This
Mexican was a true discovery. For a small place, it delivered
satisfaction on a grand scale. Where else can you have a tasting of
three guacamoles and all are artfully spiced and delicious as well as
unique? The staff treats the customer as if they’ve known you
forever. There’s a palpable homey atmosphere. It was here that,
once again my expectations about flan were proven wrong. Imagine the
amalgam of caramel custard and the technique and texture of crème
brûlée?
Tender
Steak & Sushi
132
West 47th St., New York
On
my last “staycation” in New York City I had two disappointing
experiences with hotel restaurants. One was with the one where I was
staying and the other was at the sister hotel of the one where I
stayed. Meanwhile, all the time there was this marvelous, sexy dining
spot right across the street from me. The intimate décor melded with
the top-notch cuisine mixing steakhouse with Japanese created an
excellent dining experience. That coupled with great service by an
enthusiastic and knowledgeable, caring staff more than made up for my
temerity in dining at a “hotel-restaurant.”
The
Bottom Five
For
every “Top Ten” list, unfortunately there has to be a “Bottom
Five.” These are restaurants that I would not return to unless they
were proven to have had a major upgrade one way or the other.
S
Dynasty
511
Lexington Ave., New York
You’re
almost lulled into a false sense of security and classiness by the
décor of this Midtown Chinese. Then, when you experience the
undeservedly snooty service and the ordinary food you know that your
local take-out place is friendlier, more comfortable and tastier.
Trapp
Family Lodge
700
Trapp Hull Road, Stowe, Vermont
For
a lodge that is so filled to the brim with Swiss architecture and
charm, and delightful rooms with balconies facing the scenic
mountains of Vermont, one might expect better service and food in the
dining room. I know I did. When my main course was so inedible that I
had to send it back after waiting patiently for an inordinate amount
of time I was shocked. The replacement meal was not much better and
my dining companions were disappointed as well. But the uncaring
service was unacceptable.
The
Trading Post
170
John Street (South St.), New York
Just
let it be said that when this place was the Yankee Clipper it was
many times better than what it devolved into. Before, it was a great
and homey seafood restaurant – rustic, welcoming and comfortable.
Now, it’s unsure if it’s a pub or a burger joint. The food is
pedestrian at best, run-of-the-mill at worst. Now they have a
formidable doorman and the service is “whenever we get to you.”
And the bar crowd sound like a lot more fun than dining there.
Bierhaus
NYC
712
3rd Avenue, New York
If
the almost deafening noise of this German wannabe and the close
quarters with other customers is what Oktoberfest is really like,
then I’m glad I never attended one. The beer is excellent and the
pretzels tasty, but I don’t have to go to a place where I have to
flag down the servers to get my meal and shout to be understood. The
food was good but uninspired. No return here.
Ted’s
Montana Grill
110
West 51st Street, New York
The
only reason I dined at Ted’s (named
after Ted Turner, who has a ranch where bison roam free) was for the
several bison dishes. Previously, I first tasted bison in Banf,
Canada, and loved it. Ted’s did
not improve on the recipe. As people may tell you, you don’t know
how good a place is if you don’t go there. Well, I did. And it
scared me that I knew more than my server. Sorry Ted.
Next time it will be one of the other two major steakhouses one the
same side of the same block.
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