Noah and the City of Crabs
By Steve Herte
Two
things I don’t like going through are Inventory Time at work and
having a cold. These two both started on Wednesday morning. Colds
worry me because of their ultimate consequences – laryngitis (then
I can’t sing) and nasal congestion (then I can’t taste my
dinner). Neither one is acceptable. Inventories likewise have a
double consequence. In trying to catalogue everything in storage I
always find several items not in their correct place, and when I
store them in their correct place I find other items that are either
obsolete or misfiled as well. Between the light-headedness from the
cold medication and the extreme boredom of working inventory I was
ready for an adventure on the high seas with Noah and a culinary
undersea adventure at City Crab. Enjoy!
Noah (Paramount,
2014) – Director: Darren Aronofsky. Writers: Darren Aronofsky and
Ari Handel (s/p). Cast: Russell Crowe, Jennifer Connelly, Anthony
Hopkins, Ray Winstone, Emma Watson, Logan Lerman, Douglas Booth, Nick
Nolte, Adam Griffith, Ariane Rinehart, Martin Csokas, Dakota Goyo,
Finn Wittrock, & Leo McHugh Carroll. Color, 138 minutes.
“Here
comes the rain again, falling on my head like a memory, falling on my
head like a new emotion…” These words, as sung by the
Eurhythmics, partially describe the new telling of the Genesis
account of Noah and the flood. Only it’s my memory that was jogged
by what I saw and the new emotion was the one depicted by Crowe as
Noah. In an interview, he stated that, when one thinks of it, Noah
was not always a nice man. The first thing he does after getting off
the ark is to get drunk and curse his son Ham (soon to be the
ancestor of Canaan). But no one had a more stressful life than Noah.
(Except maybe Jonah – I can’t imagine what life was like inside a
great fish.)
Biblically
appropriate this newest movie starts with Adam and Eve (Griffith and
Rinehart), the temptation of the serpent, and a ghoulishly artsy
silhouette of Cain killing Abel. Cain and his newest brother Seth go
out into the world and start two rival populations. Cain’s people
are better at subduing the Earth, as is graphically depicted by a
view from space, where we see black marks on Pangaea (yes, all the
continents were joined) and slowly but surely, Seth’s people were
wiped out down to Lamech (Csokas) and his son, Noah (Goyo).
We
join them in a devastated, treeless barren land caring for small
sedges and vegetation when a wounded creature flashes by pursued by
hunters. This is definitely a creature that did not survive the
flood: It had scales like a pangolin, an antelope’s body and a
mouth full of teeth like a predator. The lead hunter, a young
Tubal-Cain (Wittrock) accuses Lamech of stealing his kill. Lamech, in
turn, tells Noah to run and hide and Tubal-Cain kills Lamech while
Noah watches from his hiding place before running to safety.
In the
next scene Noah is a grown father of three, and he and his wife
Naameh (Connelly) are raising the boys as caretakers of the Earth
(the first ecologists and vegans). Noah has a dream/vision of
standing in bloodlike lava before a great green mountain and then
being drowned in a great volume of water. This is his cue from The
Creator (the word “God” never appears in this film) to visit his
grandfather Methuselah (Hopkins) in his mountain cave refuge. Amazed
that his grandfather should still be alive, Noah takes the entire
family to the mountain. Along the way they encounter “The Watchers”
– fallen angels sent to watch over the children of Earth who had
become disenchanted with the corruption of mankind – now
transformed into enormous grotesque rock creatures with no trust or
even liking for mankind. (The Bible does say at this point, “There
were Giants on the Earth…”) The exception is for Samyaza (voiced
by Nolte), who sees Noah as a just man and leads them to Methuselah’s
cave. Then with Shem (the oldest son) Noah goes to visit Methuselah,
who gives them a single seed that was all that remained of the Garden
of Eden.
When
planted, the seed first sprouts a bubbling spring that expands to
five rivers reaching the ends of the Earth and just as quickly, with
a great rumbling a forest explodes from the ground in minutes. And I
was wondering what Noah would build his ark from when the land was
treeless. Thanks to Samyaza, Noah now has The Watchers to help him
build the ark and the wood to build it. The rest of the story we
pretty much know. Shem (Booth) had found Ila (Watson) wounded beyond
being able to have children as a child and grows up into loving her.
Ham and Japheth (Lerman and Carroll) are not so lucky – even though
the Bible states all three had wives on the ark.
The
first animals to enter the ark are bird that fly in and roost in the
uppermost decks. Snakes and crawling creatures come next, with
mammals of all kinds being last. Naameh, who knows everything about
herbs, burns a concoction that puts all of them to sleep. (This was a
nice explanation of how they could have all coexisted on the ark.)
But a movie without conflict does not fill theaters. So, seeing the
birds and animals herding to the ark inspires the now-grown
Tubal-Cain (Winstone) to lead an assault by his people to take over
the ark.
The Watchers hold them off for a while until Tubal-Cain
discovers a method of “killing” them with fireworks on spear
tips, and one by one The Watchers geyser to Heaven in brilliant
towers of light as they fall. The last to go is Samyaza, who says
goodbye to Noah as the rain falls, the waters under the Earth spew up
in great gushers and the remaining people of Cain are prevented
access to the ark. That is except for Tubal-Cain, who hacks his way
in. (What? A stowaway on the ark?) Well that leads to another set of
complications both story-wise and biblical.
Noah is
told with accurate Biblical quotes and conformity to the dimensions
and shape of the ark itself. Crowe gives a sterling performance as an
obedient servant of the Creator who can be the gentlest of men to an
animal and yet a savage willing to sacrifice a newborn baby. (Did I
mention that Ila gives birth to twins on the ark after the 40 days
and 40 nights plus the 150 days of rising water? That’s only six
months in my reckoning). Connelly gives a passionate performance as
she defends the babies. Hopkins is his usual awesome self, and
provides the only comic relief in the movie. (For instance, Shem
mentions “berries” to him upon their first meeting, and he
obsesses about them until the flood, when he finds only one.) The
special effects team did an admirable job in creating an epic from a
Bible story. The computer graphics on The Watchers were flawless. The
scenes accompanying Noah’s story of the creation were grand and
spectacular and followed the biblical text beautifully while
obviously depicting the Big Bang and Evolution in action. As for
children, there is bloodshed and extreme violence (bodies flying left
and right) so, if your child is not ready to see that, I would not
recommend Noah.
Rating: 3½
out of 5 Martini glasses.
City
Crab & Seafood Company
235
Park Avenue South (at 19th Street),
New York
A
little beyond halfway in my database spanning the years from 1973 to
2014 is my record (number 1,698 to be precise) of first dining at
City Crab & Seafood Restaurant. This works nicely since this
restaurant has been operating successfully for nearly 20 years and I
first visited them shortly after they opened. I remembered liking my
visit and, since this site did not exist back then, I never had the
chance to write a review. So, I felt a return trip was merited. I
remembered the place as being huge, with a balcony and as Petula
Clark would describe, “…a cellar full of noise…”
Unfortunately,
as with so many lovely buildings in Manhattan, the restaurant is
surrounded by scaffolds, which makes it difficult to capture the
grand exterior. A shame, since they’ve added red chili pepper
lights to the evergreens outside in order to make the space more
festive. Inside, a multitude of conversations washed over me as I
stood at the Captain’s Station and stated my reservation. The noise
is not overwhelming, and they can hear and understand the customers.
When the young lady led me to the stairs I was secretly hoping she
would lead me to the last table bordering the balcony in the back
where the view is most spectacular. And she did.
I
noticed right away that the votive candle sitting on the brown paper
tablecloth emblazoned with names of seafood both real and imaginary
(there’s no such thing as a Chilean Sea Bass) was extinguished. A
large vase of spring branches with artificial hydrangea flowers
towered behind me. Below, I could see all the diners engaged in
business deals, personal affairs, or just enjoying their food. My
waiter Kyle brought a menu and apologized as he tended to a table of
six young girls next to mine. Another server brought the breadbasket
and a glass of water. I was starving after being on the ark with
Noah, and so I grabbed the first slice of bread. When I had a little
trouble tearing off a piece I knew it was beyond its prime and tried
the roll instead. It was fresh and, with butter, quite satisfying.
Kyle came by at that moment and I asked him to “light my fire,”
pointing to the votive candle. When he returned it was indeed lit,
but with a tiny electronic candle, which gave off a feeble
illumination to my table.
The
menu is a large affair: food on one side and drinks on the other. The
food, in turn, is broken down into Soups, Starters, Oysters, Cold
Cocktails, Cold “Towers,” House Specialties, City Salads, Fish,
Shrimp, Crab, Lobster, Pasta, Chicken and Steak & Combo Dishes,
and the ever popular Sides.
On
the drinks side, I noticed that one cocktail had “Bulldog”
English Gin, a very close second to my favorite, Beefeater. I ordered
my usual martini and after a little while Kyle was pouring it
straight from the shaker. I had to take a sip before it all fit in
the glass. I began liking this place all over again.
There
were four soups to choose from but Kyle noted that they were out of
the Maryland Crab Soup (I had my eye on that one) and I knew the
Louisiana Style Gumbo had Andouille sausage in it and the special
Potato-Leek soup came with pancetta (no meat on Fridays in Lent for
me). That left the New England clam chowder, to which I have a rather
high benchmark in my history for comparison. Then Kyle said the
Potato-Leek could be made without the pancetta. Sold! It was a nice
creamy pale green (the only color I could assume given the low
lighting) puree, nice and hot with a distinctly good flavor. Being
ravenous, I finished it without a trace left in the bowl.
Next
came the half-dozen West Coast oysters on the half-shell, resting on
a bed of ice, and perfectly chilled. Their variation in size and
shape indicated different species, but Kyle did not volunteer names
(nor did I ask). I just enjoyed, especially with the fresh
horseradish/catsup sauce. I was glad I switched from a starter to the
plate of oysters because the only starter that was remotely
interesting was the Buffalo Shrimp with Maytag Bleu Cheese. Kyle,
meanwhile, was keeping me in martinis and I was happy.
I
was anticipating the main course from the first moment I saw it
described online: the Crab Pot, containing Alaskan King Crab, Pacific
Dungeness Crab, Snow Crab and Maryland Blue Crab with corn on the cob
and boiled potatoes in a Sam Adams orange/saffron broth. Though
sounding like the perfect sampler to me, it turned out to be a little
disappointing. It was mostly Snow Crab (sure, they’re cheaper),
with only a couple of pieces of King Crab and a single Maryland Blue
Crab perched on top that was nowhere near as peppery as I remember
Maryland Crab to be. The potatoes and corn were there, but the
Dungeness must have left the building. Granted there was plenty of
food and cooked perfectly; it was just not what I expected. As for
the saffron, well, let’s just say it was light enough to be
non-existent. Still, I was having fun cracking crabs and dipping the
meat in the drawn butter.
At
this point I decided to have a glass of the 2011 “Cigar”
Zinfandel from Mendocino County as a change of pace, and it helped me
choose dessert. The Florida Key Lime Pie stood out even though I’ve
never heard of Key Lime Pie from anywhere else. It was a thick
cylinder of Key lime mousse on a graham cracker crumb base with a
thin slice of lime rising from it like a tiara. It was delightful
(but not quite what I had in the Florida Keys). The coffee made
everything come together again. It was called Caramel Coffee and was
mixed with Kahlua and Caramel Vodka. Yum!
City
Crab is a fun place to dine. It’s not quiet and romantic, but
rather boisterous and active. There’s nothing chic about it. Again,
in the words of Petula Clark, “It’s a swingin’ place…”
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