Dinner and a Movie
Smurfs Argentine
Smurfs Argentine
By Steve Herte
Once again in my Ivory Tower on the 28th floor of the UN One Hotel
(44th Street and 1st Avenue) I’m on my stay-cation for 2013. After
breakfast tomorrow I head down to Coney Island to visit the Aquarium (or what’s
been repaired after Super-Storm Sandy) and then hopefully ride the Wonder Wheel
before singing karaoke on the boardwalk with my friends Scott and Mary. There
are usually many singers available so I’ll be happy with my one signature
song, “Jump In The Line” by Harry Belafonte. It’s fun to sing and the
audience loves it, and . . . it’s appropriate for the beach. Then it’s back to
Manhattan to maybe see a movie in my room and go to dinner at a little French
Bistro called “Deux Amis” (two friends). Tonight, though, I’m going
Italian at the Osteria Laguna. Ciao, and enjoy!
Smurfs 2 (Columbia, 2013) – Director: Raja Gosnell. Cast
and Voices: Hank Azaria, Neil Patrick Harris, Brendan Gleeson, Jayma Mays,
Jacob Tremblay, Mr. Krinkle, Katy Perry, Christina Ricci, Jonathan Winters,
J.B. Smoove, George Lopez, Anton Yelchin, John Oliver, Frank Welker, Tom Kane,
Fred Armisen, Gary Basaraba, Jeff Foxworthy, Alan Cumming, Paul Reubens,
Shaquille O’Neal, & Jimmy Kimmel. Color, 105 minutes.
Gargamel (Azaria) is now a big performance star in the Paris Opera
House doing a magic act using real Smurf essence as magic and amazing
audiences. But this doesn’t mean he’s no longer after the Smurfs. He realizes
that he needs Smurf essence to continue his act and ultimately take over the
world, so he hatches a plot to kidnap Smurfette (whom he previously created to
infiltrate the Smurfs, but who was made a good Smurf by Papa Smurf) and force
her to reveal the secret recipe for the essence. He opens a portal between
Paris and Smurf village too small for himself but not too small for Vexy
(Ricci) and Hackus (Smoove), two other of his creations. But they’re not blue –
hence naughty – and depend on him for drops of essence.
Smurfette (Perry) is successfully kidnapped when she leaves the safety of the Smurf village believing that everyone forgot her birthday. Papa Smurf (Winters) has a limited supply of magic crystals to form a rescue posse and wants to choose Brainy (Armisen), Gutsy (Cumming), and Hefty (Basaraba), but due to a ruckus winds up with Clumsy (Yelchin), Grouchy (Lopez), and Vanity (Oliver). They go to New York where their friend Patrick (Harris) lives, for they know that he is the only person who can tell them the whereabouts of Gargamel, and therefore rescue Smurfette.
Patrick, his wife Grace (Mays) and their son Blue (Tremblay) are
living their life constantly catering to their circle of boring friends, even
to the point of making a low-cholesterol, environmentally-friendly, organic,
peanut-free birthday cake for their son’s party. Victor (Gleeson), Patrick’s
stepfather, appears uninvited with a wagonload of gifts and a basketful of
corndogs for all the guests. “Are there any peanuts in those corndogs?” “No, of
course not.” And after all the children take bites, “They’re deep-fried in
peanut oil.” Needless to say many children have allergic reactions and the
party is over.
The Smurfs arrive, explain their plight, and an unwilling Patrick
is “voted” into helping them. They go to Paris, where Gargamel turns Victor
into a mallard; Smurfette learns the fun of being naughty from Vexy and Hackus;
and the rescue team overcomes several obstacles in accomplishing their goal
before Gargamel accomplishes his.
This sequel proves the rule that sequels in general are not as good
as the original movie. Azaria is still fantastic as Gargamel. Harris reveals
that he actually can play a straight, non-annoying role (even though he’s a bit
wishy-washy at it), the computer graphic department does an amazing job with
the interaction of the Smurfs and live people (and Azrael’s constant antics and
laughs), but the dialogue is dull and the jokes more often than not are corny
to uninspired. The best part of the movie is when Smurfette uses her new wand
(a birthday gift from Gargamel) to speed up the giant Ferris wheel in Paris to
the point of its coming off its axle and rolling through the streets. I’ve
already seen a similar scene in the trailers for Sharknado so
it wasn’t that novel for me.
It’s a good film for families and there was one in front of me in
the theater. But I never heard the children laugh at the funny parts. Maybe
they didn’t understand them, but they didn’t even laugh at the obvious humor, i.e., when Gargamel reveals a
flight-suit to glide from the top of the Eiffel Tower to the portal below and
instead goes ricocheting down the side of the tower only to find that the
portal is only big enough for his head. I laughed a few times but not as often
as I would have liked. Even the heart-wrenching scenes were not enough to evoke
tears. Then there was the Hackus, who really became annoying after a while. Oh
well, it’s a sequel. Rating: 3½ out of 5 Martini glasses.
Estancia 460
460 Greenwich Street (at Debrosses
Street) New York
Only the address and the sidewalk café let one know that this
six-year old Argentine restaurant exists. The name is written in small letters
on the windows to the left and right of the main door. It’s a small place with
a small bar on the right and a small dining area in back, all in white with
dark wood tables and chairs. There are no tablecloths and only a half-dozen
bare-bulb swags lighting the place. A floor-to-ceiling wine shelving unit
dominates the left wall and sound travels freely. There is no room for a
captain’s station and it took several minutes for someone to notice me waiting
there. But eventually I was seated at the first table between the bar and the
dining area.
My waiter, Juan greeted me and brought a glass of water and the
menu, which had the wine list on one side and the food on the other. He asked
if I would like a cocktail and I chose the El Fuego (The Fire) which turned out
to be a deceivingly sweet drink with a surprise kick served in a vintage
champagne glass. After reciting the daily specials Juan asked me if I wished to
compose a three-course meal and I agreed. After ordering a 2009 Malbec varietal
wine from Hacienda Del Plata “Arriero” (Mendoza) and tasting its rich, sharp,
full bodied flavor I made my choices.
The first course was one of the specials. In fact I had to ask
Juan to repeat its name because what he said in his thick accent sounded much
more interesting than Potato Leek Soup. In fact it was more interesting, a pale
green and a slightly rough purée with a swirl of olive oil in the center. It
was delicious. Juan brought the breadbasket and a small dish of olive oil with chimichurri
(chopped parsley and oregano mixed with garlic). Guess who finished that?
The second course was Argentine Empanadas filled with ground beef,
Manchego cheese, and black beans accompanied by a small dish of olive oil with
chimichurri. These were excellent finger-foods and were just hot enough to
taste all the flavors but not to burn one’s fingers. The cheese and beef were
wonderful together in the crispy dough coating and when you spooned the
chimichurri onto it, it became a little bit of heaven.
On the menu, the dish I originally craved, Parillada, a typical
multi-meat Argentine dish, was for two people. Instead I chose the Grilled
Short Ribs with Roasted Garlic Mashed Potatoes and – you guessed it – more
chimichurri. Two impressive slabs of dark ribs cut across the bones instead of
along them, both wearing a green overcoat arrived flanking an Everest of mashed
potatoes. Both were delicious. The ribs were a little chewy and slightly on the
gristly side but I enjoyed the crispy parts. The potatoes were tasty but, I
don’t particularly like mashed potatoes (even garliced) and most of them
remained on the plate when I finished the meat. The wine wove through the meal
like an expert shuttle through a tapestry.
Good thing I didn’t attempt to finish the potatoes, for now I had
room for dessert: a good-sized dish of Fig Ice Cream swimming in Port wine. Not
only was this dish transporting, it made one of the waitresses jealous. Then, a
double espresso and a glass of New Orleans 10-year-old rye and I was ready for
the check. What made me think of as dining in Edith Wharton’s kitchen (I
visited her mansion) became a possible return visit to an Argentine restaurant
I had missed for much too long – especially considering that I had to visit two
websites to view their menu.
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